Step Mother vs Mother

I have identical twin step sons whom I love and treat as I do my own daughter. The problem is their mother. My husband, the biological father of the twins and my two children, is retired and starting to get a little forgetful, but we don't forget child support payments. We get paid once a month and the first bill we pay is child support.

The boys' mother is the most evil person I have ever met in my life. She hates my husband who she was once married to and had the boys with. When the boys were younger and couldn't make decisions she would use them as pawns against us, but now says their father has never been in his sons' lives.

My problem today is that one of my step sons got into trouble at school and we finally heard about it through the grapevine. Well, I got mad and called his mom and asked her why she didn't tell us about this when it happened. She claimed that my husband has never been involved in her boys lives and hung up on me. Obviously, this is not true, but all she cares about is that we send her the checks on time.

I told her that we have the right to know when something is going on in the boys' lives and that their father should be told immediately after she finds out.

I cant help it that she hates my husband and don't want to make these phone calls, but she sure doesn't have a problem using the phone if the check is a day late.

Meanwhile I sit here a nervous wreck. God forbid something bad should happen ... who knows how long it will be before we will find out.

Is there a legal way to make her inform my husband of changes in the boys life or do we have to sit around and wait to here it from the grapevine?