As a mom who struggles with the fact that my ex husband has little to do with our daughter and son, I yearn for someone to step in and be the example of male leadership for my 8 year old. I am married and there is typical step parent/child conflict between my son & husband.
The more I learn about boys, the more I realize that I can't fulfill all of those needs. Boys need men. YET, we live in a sick world and should be more suspicious of people - most people are selfish and do not stop to think about the needs of children, whatever their age.
Even if these guys are healthy, the repeated attachment children make with adults and repeated leaving, breeds feelings of abandonment and pain for these kids, until they develop their own inadequacies in being able to form healthy relationships in life. And, unfortunately, sick perverts prey on women in vulnerable situations like this.
A single mother needs her family's help (that includes you) so that she doesn't feel the need to depend on strangers to care for her kids. The boys need grandparents who are healthy, encouraging and can share their own life experiences with them.
A strong extended family environment could be the difference that allows her to relax and stop relying on new men to fill the gap. We are human and we want relationship, fulfillment - just need to find a good place to find that.
Good luck. Watch & love the boys.
Aug 04, 2009 Rating
Wrong Example by: Anonymous
Your daughter could be putting her children into potential danger and is setting the wrong example. Frequently changing boyfriends & leaving them alone with her children will lead them to think this is how women want to be treated.
More importantly, one of her boyfriends could be a pedophile or worse. Unless she plans on having a long-term relationship she should not bring men around her sons. As a single mother of girls, I'm very cautious of whom I let my children interact with.
