You are in a delicate situation that requires the skillful hand of a seasoned therapist to sort out and work through. Although your husband has struggled through his own darkness and now counsels others, neither one of you seems to see the importance of allowing your adult children to do the same. This is called denial. The fact that you report that they had a good relationship with their step father as young children, despite the fact that he molested them in their teens, further proves this out.
Child molestation whether it happened once or repeatedly can leave scars into adulthood (read my article on child incest). It seems that your sympathies are entirely with your husband who has overcome his problems with alcohol and turned his life around. Although he has put his past behind him, this does not mean that past wrongs for which he has not made himself accountable cannot come back to haunt him. He simply hasn't earned that right.
You have a choice to make. Either you are willing to go through this process with your adult children (who it was your duty to protect when they were younger and vulnerable to this man's abuse)or you are going to lose your family. Either way, this could tear apart your family and rip apart what your husband has worked so hard to build.
I suggest that you get a therapist (if you need one, I can recommend one.) Your husband is not qualified to counsel anyone in this case.)
