My uncle raped me for 8 years.
(Cincinnati, Ohio, United States)
I'm 43 years old now, and it's been nearly 30 years since it happened, but I'm still so messed in the head. I tried therapy, with medication, and it hasn't worked at all. I still think about it almost daily. I don't trust any man now, even my husband. I still have to see my uncle sometimes, and it's so hard to be around him.
I told my mom when I was 16 years old, and she didn't believe me, and told me I must've liked it because I "let it happen for 8 years." That devastated me so much, and my relationship with my mother is strained.
I got addicted to oxycontin, and pretty much whatever drug I could find. I still want to be kinda high every day, because I just am trying not to feel it anymore. But it seems impossible.
I've attempted suicide 3 times, and unfortunately they didn't work. My husband left me twice because of my severe mood switches and just being a bitch to him. I'll never, ever get over what he did to me, and I wish he dies everyday. My whole life was destroyed by him, and I didn't get to have a childhood because I was being raped almost daily. I will always be shattered inside. It's so hard just staying alive. I'm still suicidal, and think about it a lot. Rape/Molestation ruined my life. That's all I have to say. Thanks for listening.