help me please i dont know what to do

by tarn kelly

when i got with my partner, i had no children of my own but he had a 6 year old from his last relationship. the ex was crazy and kept threatening us and following us so i had to take out a restraining order against her.

his son was quiet from the beginning and seemed to like me, even when i fell pregnant a few months later. but as soon as bubby was born everything changed. my partner was getting stressed out at work, also we were trying to sell our house.

the son started to stop listening to me and started throwing wild temper tantrums. he blames me for his parents split and he also has made it crystal clear that he hates me and wants me to leave, wishes i never met them and that bubby is not related to him!

i have gone out of my way to be friends, in the start i have always said i wanted to be friends i was never taking over being his mum, but it always turns out the same way. he tells his dad that im mean to him (without telling him what he did to deserve it) and my partner and i have a talk about how i gotta try harder to be nice to the boy and how before i came along his life was very hard and upsetting for him. he also always tells me that the boy loves me because thats what boy tells dad.

i look after him everyday before and after school and weekends, while my partner works full time hours. everyday the boy does things just to upset me so he can go tell his dad. his also gone and told the inlaws stories (which is close to the truth i will admit) so now they are wary of me and think im just like the boys mum!

i have tried talking to my partner about it but he just rolls his eyes and asks "whats the matter now?" he told me recently if i dont make this work now, then i cant have him!

please help me! his the love of my life, the father of my first child. i do love the boy and wish he would accept me but he is just so stubborn and blames me for everything. i always tell people that his my son, i treat him as if he was mine, but then he goes and tells everyone we know that im not his mum im just his dads girlfrind!

i do everything for them, their breakfast and lunches, clean the house, look after the dogs and the boys lizard, wash all the clothes, run errands and of course i have bubby too. i feel like im their slave!

i just dont know what we, as a couple, are anymore. the only affection i get is a peck on the lips before he leaves for work, he tells me he loves me all the time but he also calls me names such as "slageth."

we never do anything together, not even when the kids are in bed. sometimes, when im lucky or he wants some, i get cuddles in bed but i need more than that, i just dont feel loved needed or wanted.

i just dont know if i can take it anymore. im not allowed to discipline the boy, or make fun, or anything, no talks to him about serious stuff. but if i tell my partner what he does he just doesnt listen to me, he thinks i lie, and have been all along!

im so alone in this i cant talk to anyone im suffering and dieing on the inside. please please please help me, anything... any advice or someone i can talk to or anything im going insane.

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Dec 12, 2010
by: Anonymous

your only hope. Not sure where you are from but if they have accredited Marriage and Family Counselors there I would go and see one.

If your partner does not want to go, go by yourself. Your life is a mess and you need more help than you can get on line.

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