Grounding your children

my question is: what would you have done?

Story - im a single mother(37), and I have Two teenage sons, One 15 the other is 17. I let my children curse, as I know they do at that age, AS LONG as they don't curse AT me. anyway, I just grounded both my sons for 2 & 3 weeks. Here is what happened:

I came home from work around 10pm (I had a late shift; then had a work party to go to) when I came home I found my sons having a party. I wouldn't have cared if when I walked in the house wasn't a disaster. I found my 15 year old and asked him calmly to have everyone leave, after about 20 minutes everyone was finally gone and while I was cleaning up I finally found my 17 year old walking in the back door drunk as a skunk and I asked him where he got this liquor from & he told me that it was none of my f-ing business.

Well I decided that I was kind of aggravated & just ignored him and went to sleep. when I woke up I told both of them that they were going to fix up the rest of the house seeing that they made this mess in the first place. I went out to buy some food and when I came back they were both drinking some left over alcohol from the night before (I do NOT allow them to drink!)

I was mad and told them they were grounded for 2 weeks, when I told them that, the 17 year old smacked me in my face (I'm not talking about a slap- it was like a backhand!) so I told him he was grounded for another week.

This happened yesterday and today my 15 year old kept apologizing and tried to get out of being grounded. (he won't) & my 17 year old apologized for hitting me when I walked in his room this morning to put some things in his room. But besides that he hasn't come out all day.

the point of this is, am I being to mean? is 2 weeks too much? & 3 weeks? or is it the right amount of time? I only grounded them around once or twice in the past so I don't really know.. :/ thanks in advance!

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Nov 19, 2011
Grounding Children is Not Mean
by: Laura Ramirez

Grounding children is not mean if you do it right. It is okay to take away privileges from kids who are defiant and irresponsible. Your son backhanded you across the face when you attempted to impose consequences for doing something that he probably knows he shouldn't have done.

What is "mean" is allowing your children to get away with this type of behavior because believe me, if they treat you this way and get away with it, they will be emboldened to act the same way with other authorities, who simply will not tolerate such defiance. In this way, you are setting up your teens to eventually get into trouble with the law. I know this is not what you want.

I suggest you read the total transformation review and get the program. It will teach you how to set firm limits with your kids without being harsh or cruel. It will help you change the climate in your home so that your boys will help you, respect you, follow house rules that are designed for everyone's well-being and so that you no longer need to be afraid that you will be hit by the children that you work so hard to support.

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