Full Time Live-in Grandma

My daughter is a single parent with a 28 month old. My daughter is also in the military and works the midnight shift and will be deployed sometime. I agreed to help her relocate to the new base, and then help with the baby.

Her parenting styles strongly oppose mine. There is no consistency in the child's life. There is absolutely NO consistent with regard to right and wrong behaviors that are expected from this child.

I have a husband and home back in my home state. Should I go home and let her be the parent that she wants to be? My biggest concern is that I may be ruining my "grandma" status forever. I need help for my well being.