Conflict with husband over disciplining the kids

by jacqueline
(chicago, il)

I recently married about 4 months ago. And with that came 2 children, my 9 year old and his 4 year old. Recently we had a huge blow up over a conflict with husband over disciplining the kids. It was about a disciplinary action that I enforced on the children.

They were in their room, supposed to be watching tv with their cousins, when they broke the bedpost! So I punished everyone including his daughter. Before I could punish my daughter, her father showed up to pick her up, so I told her she will get hers when she comes back from there.

Needless to say that did not sit well with my husband at all. He was furious that his daughter got punished and mine "got away free." When I explained to him that she will get hers when she comes back, he said that is not good enough, and from now on to leave any disciplinary action involving her to him.

I need help. How do I explain to my husband that I m not playing favorites with the girls, and when it comes to discipline that it is shared equally. I love my husband, but I do not want this to be an issue.

Desperate stepmom

Defiant Child Behavior problems

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Aug 06, 2012
not too bright
by: Anonymous

Let me get this straight. You spanked a four year old stepdaughter for something she may or may not have done. I say spanked because you used the words punished and disciplined and terms like she will get hers when she gets back. Evidently you dont mind spanking but do not like to talk about it.You have only been married four months so the child barely knows you. Did the childs father know that you intended to use spanking as discipline? Another thing,I find it hard to believe that a for year old would have the weight or strength to break a bedpost, but a nine year old might. My advise to you if you want to stay married is to drop the subject and in the future keep your hands to yourself, because a repeat performance of your recent actions against his daughter would almost certainly mean bye bye marriage and maybe a black eye as a going away present, ps GROUP PUNISHMENT WENT OUT WITH HIGH BUTTON SHOES

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